Milk Sharing

Before coming to the Philippines, "Milk Sharing" was a foreign concept to me and something I'd never think was acceptable for many reasons but mainly because of the intimacy involved.  The type of milk sharing that I am referring to is similar to a "wet nurse" in the United States, the process by which a woman other than the mother of a child breastfeeds the child from her bare nipple.

At my center there are a few young ladies who are mothers and breastfeed their children.  Breastfeeding is the norm here in the Philippines of mothers and is encouraged for as long as the mothers are able to nurse.  Women breastfeed everywhere, on the jeepney, sitting outside, during sessions, at a restaurant, EVERYWHERE unlike the U.S. where a mother may hesitantly breastfeed in a bathroom or a non-crowded place while the child's face as well as her breast is covered.  Here a mother will hold the child in one arm and pull down her shirt in order to take out one her breasts and the rest is history.  They do it so quickly I just stared and am in awe.  The women do wear bras but they are used to easy access for the babies. Some women will cover her breast and the child's face with a handkerchief while others are not bothered by it as long as her nipple is not exposed.

At first I was a little uncomfortable being around the young women breastfeeding because in the states we typically don't watch a woman breastfeed, and will give the nursing mother space to finish up.  But here is a different story, it is normal and accepted. On occasions in the airport I have seen couples bottle feed their children but those were more affluent Filipinos.  Depending on the age of the baby that milk is all that the baby's have with no supplement.  Other babies simply treat the breast as a pacifier and need it to fall asleep or soothe when irritable or wanting attention.

Most of the girls seem to get the hang of it, on occasions a new mother will complain about their nipples being sore and hurting from the baby sucking on it or not being able to produce enough milk.  I've only witnessed one girl who breasts returned to normal size post delivery although she was nursing.  After a few weeks she said that her ducts had dried up and she could not produce anymore milk.  I felt so bad for her because part of being a mother here in the Philippines meant that breastfeeding was part of motherhood. It is like a rites of passage in a way, that you are able to provide for your child in the most natural way. Then I saw the most perplexing thing in my life! Another young lady took her baby and was attempting to nurse him.  Before I stepped in I had to watch the following occur; A) if this could work, B) if the baby was actually going to latch on to the nipple and suck for milk.  They said it was working but I thought to myself this can not be sanitary.  Milk is like any other bodily fluid and is possible of transmitting viruses and diseases therefore one should be careful and make sure the individual is not infected within ie HIV.  For the sake of intimacy aforementioned, I would think that a mother should only feed his or her own child.  More than feeding takes place during breastfeeding.  Bonding between the mother and child is evident therefore for attachment reasons the baby should not be exposed to another woman's breast.  Consider the slight conflict this causes with your own small child that you are still nursing when another child is introduced to her "property". Not to mention your child was sucking on your breast earlier and you did not properly clean your nipple since then.  So many ideas ran through my head at that point.  The houseparent seemed okay and I have not seen the girls do it since that initial time.  I think she is now able to produce milk again.

After doing some further research on the topic I have found that milk sharing is on the rise but by bottle feeding with mothers who are infection free and able to nurse other children. I reached out to a few of my friends here to see if they had heard of this.  Some replied that slaves used to do this many years ago and it was available milk.  Another friend mentioned that this occurs at her center also.  Yet another friend was baffled by this concept but reported back that this is legit and like any other bodily fluid just exercise caution when doing so.

I have to admit it was nice of the other young lady to her the mother whose milk duct had dried. Since being here in country I have definitely been influenced to try out different things regarding child care (when the time is right) such as breastfeeding and using cloth diapers to name a few. Seems like such better options but I'm not sure a Western schedule (always busy and no time for such things) would work with these options if I am a working mother.  I don't know many mothers who continued to breastfeed after child birth.  Many mother can't get their children to latch on, don't produce enough milk for the child or are just frustrated by the task. An advanced technology also allows for the opportunity not to breastfeed but pursue other options such as formula, use a breastpump etc.  But here in the Philippines for the average woman, she does not have any other choice then to do what comes natural.

A Black nanny nursing a child other than her own.